Yes, it has been a while since my last blog, I see my fellow
Ordinands are well ahead of me here, but I do have a few good reasons, or to
put another way some relatively creative excuses. I started a new job, which
has proven extremely demanding, I have been stretched up and down and left and
right and in a few other directions that I didn’t even know existed through my
college studies, nothing more than what they term formation, but it took me to
some interesting spaces, I don’t mean the glorious buildings one may associated
with church, I mean the emotional roller coaster of life. And of course, I need
to ensure I have quality time with my family, for all our sakes.
It was tough.
I don’t mind admitting, I have found myself in some dark
places since staring training, challenged in ways I hadn’t been fully prepared
for and so it didn’t seem the right and proper thing to write down my thoughts before
now, but now on reflection I think it is safe to say that I have perhaps become
a little wiser from the experience, though you will not find me admitting to
being wise.
Lectures have been running at what could possibly be
calculated at approximately 100MPH and in a language that was pulling me out of
my depths, could this be the Hebrew they speak of in the Old Testament, or
perhaps the Greek of the New Testament, or maybe it was the contemporary
language in Jesus’ time of Aramaic? I fear it was just English, but not as we
know it Jim..!
I would never profess to be what one may call an expert in
biblical academia, but whereas I thought I had a reasonable grasp in the Old
and New Testaments, at times it felt like the whole bible was becoming the
Apocrypha, that is a text I had not read nor heard before.
So you see, I was hearing things coming at me at an
incredible speed, in a language I didn’t understand and texts that were as
unexplored as a mission to Mars.
To put simply, I felt out of my depth.
And to top it all, the first assignment handed in came back
with some shocking news that threw me off balance a little; I’d missed some pretty
key elements. So what does one do in a situation like this? Panic, give up or
take a step back and figure out a more productive next step, I am pleased to
report I took the latter option.
I soon came to realise that although I had a fair grasp of
some aspects of Biblical texts, there were far more dimensions than I had
considered, most of it around the historicity of key events.
Then it all made sense.
But with some carefully planned reading of some easily
digestible texts, mostly calling themselves something along the lines of ‘An
Introduction to…’ suddenly all the foreign language and pace of lectures
started to take shape. I can’t tell you what a relief that was.
And so I found myself not only understanding what was being
said and at a pace I could digest, but actually enjoying the lectures,
embracing what was being said and, not trying to sound too clever, even
managing to critically evaluate what was being presented and discussed.
And although I am quite probably the least likely to ever
set the academic world on fire with my revelation insights in to new ways of
thinking, I was now getting grades worthy of a good pass, I started to
understand more of just how much I didn’t know, but this wasn’t a problem to me
as I am now beginning to build what I believe are the foundational building
blocks of what will be a lifetimes learning. Some subjects and one or two
lecturers have even inspired me to what I think may one day become a future
areas of ministry.
However there is one area, as with life, that has pulled me
through more than any other. I know you expect me to say, prayer, or God or
some such, and of course, there is no doubt this played an important part, but
however you look at it, whether answer to prayer or God working, it is my
fellow Ordinands that have quite possibly been the biggest help. There is
nothing like comradery or people who are going through a similar harrowing
experience and I know many of my fellow Ordinands were experience pretty much
the same as me, maybe subtly different areas of challenge, but challenge
nonetheless. And it is this shared experience and share compassion and shared
practical help and discussion that has kept me smiling, encouraged and getting
my assignments in on time. Oh and I mustn’t forget the humor, there are one or
two who should they ever decide ministry is not for them, I think the comedy
circuit would welcome them with open arms.
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